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Letting Go of Who We Learned to Be

Letting Go of Who We Learned to Be

May 27, 2023

In this episode of Waking Up with Melissa, we’re diving into the topic of why it’s so difficult to change our lives. Despite our awareness of the benefits that changing our behavior, thoughts, and perspective brings into our life, the truth is, it’s challenging right? Take a journey with us as we explore the art of letting go of who we’ve learned to be out of survival. So, let’s dive in!


[03:39] How society has taught us to be a pro at fixing everything 
[13:36] Embracing the opportunity to feel and process emotions
[19:32] Learning the mechanics of the law of resonance and oneness
[21:34] Becoming the Pivot Kween/King at every stage of your life
[25:02] Changing your environment so you step into your newness

Learning to be a new human

We almost are programmed into fix it mode. Nobody actually ever teaches you to let it go. Nobody teaches you that you actually don’t have to do anything. Some of the things that I work on with my clients the most is literally the art of letting go. It’s literally the art of detaching. It’s literally just allowing ourselves to commune with the present moment

If we can just allow things to just be as they are, one, that would bring us so much peace, and two, we would just be happier as a human race. Give yourself grace to understand that you’ve learned to be this version of yourself. And so the conversation isn’t about hacking your system. The conversation is about learning to be a new human. It’s about learning to be a new version of you.

Remember that you need to feel it in order to heal it

The brain is connected to our survival and it’s not going to help you heal. That’s not where the light is shining through. It’s in your heart. It’s in your spirit. It’s in the awareness of these things that are arising in us. There’s no way to cognitively think our way into healing.

So many of us are not ready for the opportunity to heal different parts of ourselves because we’re not ready and willing to feel it. By the way, it’s all good. You go at your own pace. This is not a podcast about how you need to heal and you need to do this right now. That’s not the energy. You’re ready when you’re ready.

If you’re at a place where you start to feel the discomfort and you stopped running away from it, you stopped avoiding it, then that’s an indicator that that is an opportunity for you to look further into that and to step into the healing path of whatever that part is evoking in you. 

Change your environment

I started to go to healing classes. Change your environment because that is what’s going to cultivate this new way of being. There’s nothing wrong with you. You have to thank this part. But you also have to help by cultivating a new environment. How can you want yourself to change and you’re still doing the same shit? You can’t. And maybe I shouldn’t say you can’t, maybe you could, but damn, it’s going to be hard.

Allow the change to be a lifelong journey

Make sure that you continue to be the student of your life every single day. Every single day, I’m learning shit about myself. Every single day, I’m letting go more and more and more again.

It doesn’t happen overnight. I can tell you six and seven years later, I’m still letting go. I’m still letting go of parts I thought I let go of two years ago, and it shows up again. We’re always letting go. And we’re always learning. 

We’re always learning to be a new human, a new being.

If you enjoyed this episode and experienced a shift or got more clarity, I would love for you to screenshot this episode, share it on Instagram, and tag @iammelissaruiz – let’s start a conversation!

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An entrepreneur by heart, Melissa helps other women start and scale their business, while keeping their spirits aligned and embracing new challenges.

Melissa Ruiz

Hi humans I'm Melissa